First Grade Retention Part 3

Decisions! Decisions!

At the Pre-IEP meeting, all the teachers recommended retention. I resisted the idea, then kind of got used to it. At the IEP meeting, they all recommended promotion. I went along with it, since that's what I wanted, although I wasn't 100% on it.

Just this past weekend, I started having major second thoughts again. A series of coincidences (are there any coincidences?) made it pretty clear to me that God was sending me a message (hitting me over the head with a brick might be more accurate).

Saturday evening, we went to a church event and I ended up sitting next to a woman with a special needs child and discussing the retention question with her. They had gone through the debate with her 13 yo special needs (ADD, etc, learning disabled) child, ended up retaining her in 5th grade, and then sent her to a private school for learning disabilities for 6th grade where she has thrived.

Sunday morning while sitting in church, I started thinking about all the advantages to retention - confidence in her academic abilities, having school be fun, self-esteem, strengthening her academic foundation, etc. The social aspect that I'd been leaning on - I didn't want her to lose her friends; I didn't want two sisters in the same grade - seemed less important.

After church Sunday, I went to Starbucks instead of going home. Atypical, since my family was at home waiting for me. My cell phone died, so my husband couldn't talk me out of it. So I went and ended up meeting a father and son. Guess what? The son was special. I ended up talking to the father at length about challenges, including the retention debate, which he just went through again for 9th grade.

Something he said made more sense than it had before: At this point in Demi's academic career, we don't KNOW her potential. So we HAVE to give her the best opportunity to succeed academically, which I believe would be retention now, for all the reasons mentioned above.

This week, I received a number of end-of-year assessment results, including CRCT, all of which were more positive than negative. She actually passed (barely!) all of her CRCT's. Although she's struggling, she's getting it. With another year, she'll have a much firmer foundation and perhaps be able to succeed on her own. (I'm always optimistic!)